So I heard a tapping on my window…

I hate it when it’s about midnight and I hear a tap on my window. The blinds are closed so I can’t see what it is, but i think “maybe it was just a bug”. Like a moth or something, trying to get to my light. Then I hear it again. It’s too loud to be a moth.
It could be a burglar or murderer, tapping on my window, but what is the likelihood they’d tap on the window of a well lit room? Or maybe in the murdering burglar circle, this has become a popular tactic, because who would expect that right?

So moth is out, but murglar is still a possibility. Could be one of the little kids from next door. They lost their kittens earlier today, but then came over to show them off and tell us they found them. It’s the 4th of July, maybe the fireworks scared them off and they ran away. Maybe the neighbor kids saw a light on and wanted to come see if I’ve seen the kittens, or ask for help finding them.

Why do things have to be so complicated to the point where you’re not sure if there’s a murglar at your window, or concerned little kitten seeking children? (Yes firefox, “murglar” IS a word, add it to my dictionary please)

But maybe it’s neither a murglar nor little children. It could possibly be Scarlett Johansson. Perhaps lost on the way to or from some film location. Perhaps a flat tire. No place around to get it fixed at this time of night. Maybe my light caught her eye and she thought she’d seek help by tapping on my window. Hot celebrities get flat tires too.

I could ignore it and possibly not get murgled, not save kittens, or not meet Scarlett Johansson, who I’d probably end up talking to and totally hit it off. There’s at least a 30% chance we’d end up getting married, or at the very least she’d help start my acting career as the love interest in a film or two of hers.

I’m pretty sure I’ve narrowed down the possibilities to these three. So I’ve got a 33% chance of being murgled, which is not cool, but on the other hand, there’s a 33% chance some little kids need help, and a 33% chance Scarlett Johansson wants my babies. So that’s a 66% chance of something good, and only a 33% chance of death or dismemberment… I’ve got to check…

I grab my flashlight and pocket knife and pull up the blinds completely. I can’t see anything but my own reflection. I quickly slide the window open and stand back, out of murglar grabbing range. And that’s when the God damn bat flew in. Didn’t even look anything like Scarlett Johansson 😦

Explore posts in the same categories: My stories, fact or fiction, past and present.

2 Comments on “So I heard a tapping on my window…”

  1. Janyaa Says:

    Eep! So, they’re replacing ravens for bats now, huh? I would totally freak out!

    Also, I think murglar is an awesome word. Totally going to use that.

    • enpfhy Says:

      Bats are a lot creepier than ravens. I don’t know why ravens are so popular. Bats should definitely replace them. If I ever write a book it will definitely have bats. Not sure how I’ll work them in there, but there’s always room for bats somehow.

      You can use murglar all you want, but I reserve the right to make the “don’t murgle me bro!” T-Shirts 😀

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